Neen James - Exceptional Experiences

Ian Altman 0:02

Ian, welcome to the same side selling podcast. I am your host. Ian Altman,

Ian Altman 0:12

I've had the good fortune to know Neen James for many years. She is a dear friend, which is what happens with anyone who meets Nene. Anytime I meet somebody who knows Neen, they go on for extended periods bragging about how wonderful she is. And it happens to be true. She's featured in our same side selling Academy outside experts as an expert on productivity and attention. And today, Neen is here to discuss her latest book, exceptional experiences. We're going to explore how creating luxury level experiences isn't just for high end consumer brands. It's a proven way to sell smarter, build deeper client relationships, and, of course, grow revenue. So Neen, welcome to the podcast my friend

Neen James 0:56

G'day, gorgeous, what a treat it is to be back. I love what you're doing in the world, and especially the same side selling Academy.

Ian Altman 1:04

You know what? It's one of the most enjoyable things I get to do every month is when we have our Coaches Corner, and we're live coaching with people, and then you see the results really, really inspiring. So let's dive into this whole idea of exceptional experiences. And one of the things that caught my attention is that you say that luxury isn't about money, but it's about how you make people

Ian Altman 1:26

You know what? It's one of the most enjoyable things I get to do every month is when we have our Coaches Corner, and we're live coaching with people, and then you see the results really, really inspiring. So let's dive into this whole idea of exceptional experiences. And one of the things that caught my attention is that you say that luxury isn't about money, but it's about how you make people feel. So how did that insight shape and kind of model the book?

Neen James 0:56

I'm so fortunate I have the only luxury mindset research study of its kind. So literally, I've always believed that luxury is a mindset. Now, luxury as a word, Ian can be quite divisive, and even as your listeners, people watching this are thinking, luxury is maybe not for me, and I think as a word, people associate it with elite or unapproachable or expensive. And what I'd like people to think about is luxury as a mindset. When I was a little girl, I was raised by a single mom, and we lived in a caravan. Now in America, they call that a trailer park, but I remember my mom worked so hard Ian. She would clean houses, she picked lettuce, she sold fruit on the side of the road. But no matter how tired my mum was at the end of a busy shift, she would always walk through a community garden, and she would pick a flower, and she would bring it back to our little caravan, and she'd put it in a glass. We called it a vase because we felt fancy. And my mom reminded me that as little girls, she said, You know, it's not about money or things that everyone deserves luxury. And I had this role model since I was young, and I believe from my mom that luxury is this mindset. And so in all of my consulting with luxury brands CEOs around the world, what I realized is that there's plenty of things out there to say that luxury makes you how he makes you feel, research studies, but there was nothing about how we think about it. And business owners and people who are responsible for revenue, like people listening to your podcast, they need to know, how do we drive revenue? And so I was like, well, it's luxury, it's a mindset. So what I did is this research study, and that's when I found it's not about things, it's about experiences. It's exactly like you say, I'm on this mission, Ian, the stealth message of the book, just between you and Ian is this is, I want people to feel seen, heard and valued. Luxury does that better than so many industries. So that's what has really been this body of work that I've created in exceptional experiences, you know, and what you just highlighted is this amazing connection between story and selling and story and luxury, because if you have a luxury experience, you come out of it with a story. If you have a story for your customers, then that translates usually to selling, because now you have a story and how they reach a better outcome, how they solve something, and it creates that emotional connection and trust that people have that I think often is overlooked, especially in the world of selling, because people get so focused on the sale, they sometimes forget to look to the outcome, or what's the story that customer is going to be able to share six months from now. That gives them that wonderful experience. And people need to go back to the episode that you and Tamsen Webster did together, because you have this fantastic podcast about her book. Say what they can't on here, and the two of you are talking about this very topic. And so often people are just like, I think you both were calling it benefit bombing. You're just telling people all the features and benefits of things instead of the story, and helping elevate the story they're already telling themselves, the narrative that is there, and building on that, one of the things we talk about in the book is the importance of storytelling. For sure, if you're trying to entice the attention of clients, but your origin story, why does your company do what it does?

Neen James 5:00

Why does your brand stand for what it does? What is your origin story? And if you've ever shopped in a luxury brand, let's take someone like Chanel, even if you've gone to the Chanel department store at the makeup counter, and what you'll notice is any sales associate, they get so excited about the product, the product name, even the merchandising, because everything ties back to Coco herself. And so, for example, one of their lipsticks we feature this story in the book is the merchandising is designed to look like the staircase in her apartment that she would watch her models walk down. And so the lipstick case that this is built on is on that story. So every time you ever walk into any of these boutiques, of these luxury brands are telling you the story, and people are like, Oh, if I use my lipstick, I'm going to feel closer to Coco Chanel herself. So as sales leaders, we need to think about the stories that we tell ourselves, the stories that we share about the products and services that we offer. Because people connect to story 100%

Ian Altman 6:03

and one of the things that I found interesting was in the research, you did this research in the luxury mindsets, and you defined four different luxury mindsets. So can you highlight those and help the people in sales? How can they quickly spot which one a client might have,

Neen James 6:21

you bet. And what we'll do is, in the show notes, let's add a Free Self Assessment. They can take themselves as well. Ian, it'll take less than five minutes, so you'll be able to discover it. So let me go high level of the four luxury mindsets. And as you're listening and watching this, I want you to think, which 1am I? Okay, so think about yourself first. So what I realized is there's not one luxury mindset. There's four, but the first one is the one we call the reluctant and removed. Now they make up 28% of their mindset study. And what was really interesting is they feel a little bit guilty about luxury. They think luxury is hard because to them, they think brands don't understand them, and they're very busy. So if you want to speak the luxury language of whatever your product or service does, for the reluctant and removed mindset, to speak their luxury language, you've got to explain how you can save them time and hassle. That's what they need to hear from you. So understand they're going to be telling you about how busy they are everything that's on their plate. That's a good indication that that's maybe that mindset, the second of the luxury mindsets. This is our pro prioritizer. We use the word pro because they use luxury to advance their career and reputation. They're looking for brands to have longevity that are authentic, and they're really, really focused on your environmental and societal impact. So to speak their luxury language, you want to talk about how your products and services will help advance their professional development, their career reputation, and you really want to focus in on sustainability. What are you doing to make a greater impact in the world with what you're doing? That's how you speak their luxury

Ian Altman 8:00

life, what percentage do they make up? I

Neen James 8:02

think they were like 22% what's really fascinating about all of these is they almost evenly split, right? So that's what blew my mind about that. And then this the pro prioritize. What you're going to find with this person is, when you're speaking with them, you want to think about really making sure that you're using words like reputation, authenticity, long lasting. That's the kind of things our friend Tamsin. She's absolutely a pro prioritizer, and she supports brands like DVF, Diana Von Furstenberg, because she has those dresses forever. She has story, and there's so much about that right. Then the third in the luxury mindset is the confidence and content. This is the person who says, I don't really need luxury. I'm good, like, I got this, right? However, they use luxury to create memories with people they care about. So to speak their luxury language, let's say you're a Travel Advisor. What you might do is say, Imagine taking a photo of your family in the cherry blossoms in DC. You get off the private tour boat, and then you take that photo that becomes the Holiday Card. That's how you speak the luxury language of the confident content they want to know you're doing something that's going to advance that depth of relationship with them, beautiful also in the in the high 20s, then we have the luxury lover, oh, Ian, the luxury lover, the luxury lover. You can spot them a mile away, because they say luxury for everyone, every day. And they say, You know what, I am worth it, and so are you. They're not using or wearing luxury brands to show off. They're using it because they appreciate that they are worth it, and they love to share the luxury lover. What they want to know is, if you want to speak their luxury language, they want behind the scenes exclusive access. They want to meet the engineer who designed the product. They want the chef to come out of the kitchen at the restaurant and say, Get. Day they want to be invited to that private event or before opening hours. So what they want is to know that they are important to you. Now, here's why this person is someone I want all salespeople to focus on, because the luxury lover has a big mouth. They have the people who will talk about you everywhere. They will talk about you on social media. They will write the testimonial you want. They'll write the reviews on Google, and they will also tell their friends about you. They are the most influential across all four mindsets in also persuading the other mindset. So in a sales conversation, you might have very different mindsets you're trying to appeal to. You might have a couple. You might have, let's say you. Let's go back to the Travel Advisor. Let's say you have two husbands who want to plan a destination wedding. One might be a reluctant and a removed, and one might be a luxury lover, and you have to speak the luxury language of both. So as a salesperson, you want to start thinking about what's your own luxury language, because you see the world a certain way, and are you speaking from that place? And then what are the luxury languages that you need to speak for the mindsets you serve

beautiful and for those of you at home wondering, I'm definitely the luxury lover category. I don't want to project onto Nene, but she's definitely

commissioned this time. Study into luxury as a mindset. So mine is an absolute giveaway, but here's why I think it's important for people. I have a friend who lives in your area, and I remember having this debate with him, and he was like, lean, luxury is unnecessary. And I was like, Huh, okay, tell me more. And he was like, I don't need all the things. And I said, okay, but you've he's a philanthropist, by the way. He is very, very generous human being. And so I was like, but you have tops to your status on the airlines, you said, Yeah. And the hotels, he said, Yeah. And and then we talked about, he likes to use the fast lanes, where you pay premium depending on the time of day. And I was like, Huh. And so I said, so your luxury is time, yeah. So as we're listening to this, I want you to think about so he could be a reluctant and removed his luxury is time. So if you're talking to someone like him, they want to know, he wants to know, what are you doing to help save time, make his life easier? So why sales people need to know their own luxury mindset is they know how they're filtering the world, but they need to understand that of the clients they serve, especially if you're in the business of trying to attract new business, the ones that are the most vocal that really become advocates for you are the luxury level, but the pro prioritize is not too far behind them. So as long as they can understand that you're going to really honor and do what you say you're going to do. That's going to help.

Yeah. And as I was reading the book, I was thinking, the proprietizer is often that person who, if you're delivering something that makes them the hero in their organization, gives them high visibility and accolades for what they're doing, solves a problem that they then get to say, look what I did. That's a person who often will then become a huge advocate and brag to other people, look what I did. And you could do this too with these people.

You know, what's really cool about the pro prioritizer is they love professional development, so they're the people who love to mentor others. Their belief is that we should always be investing in the next person, the next opportunity. So also thinking about, and your observations are 100% correct. So think about, how do you then appeal to that person, knowing that you whatever product or service you are offering to them is going to help not only their organization, but it's also going to help them and the influence they have, especially if you're talking about you might be a brand new vendor to them, and they already have a relationship. They need to understand why. That's also going to help them by you being that new vendor.

Yeah, and it's interesting, because it's one of the things in same side selling, we always tell people, Look, you want to find out how important is this to the organization and to the individual when they're trying to solve something. And people say, Why is it? Because sometimes it's important to the organization but not to the individual, and vice versa. You have to know where their priorities are. So I want to

talk about being a valuable resource in same side selling, and that is part of this extension of this.

Yeah. So let's talk about this experience elevation model so you break down, and I don't want to give away all the book. And for those people, when you look on Amazon, it looks like this. And if you go to your local booksellers, this is what it looks like. And you should definitely pick it up, because you can tell I've read it cover to cover and then some. But so you break down five luxury levers, and let's talk about what those are, and then how those tie into the world of sales. If you want to get top results for your team, take a look at the same side selling Academy. Just visit same side selling.com to learn more,

because I've been consulting to global brands for such a long time, whether it says a keynote speaker or whether it's as a confidant to CEOs around the planet. What. I've noticed is that there were these five luxury levers that I was always consulting on luxury brands do this so well, and so I noticed that there's all these systems of elevation I had been explaining to my clientele, and that's what these levers will do. So the first of the luxury levers, I want people to visualize a triangle. At the bottom of the triangle. What I want you to be thinking about is mind share. How do you capture the attention of potential clients, or maybe even existing clients? Let's call that mind share at the top of the triangle. I want us to think of it as market share. How do you drive revenue? How do you be top of mind? Top of market that's the triangle. Now let's go through the five luxury levers. How are you going to go from mind share to market share? The first is entice. This is where you need to capture the attention of people through techniques. We've already been talking about things like storytelling, origin story, being collaborative and creative in the way that you partner with people. That's called entice. How do you entice them to start thinking about you and your brand? The second of the luxury leavers is invite. Now you've got their attention. Invite them into your community so you give them that sense of belonging. It's here that you need to speak their luxury language, and then roll out the red carpet for them so they feel like that top tier client you want them to be. Then we move to the next the next one is about Excite. I love this luxury lever, because this one is where you're going to really be share worthy, give them an experience that they want to share with others, but engage all five senses so that you can really stand out. And then we move to delight. Delight is where you show the client you really know them, where you make them feel seen and heard and valued, which is really the stealth message of this book. And this is where you're giving them this exclusive experience. And then the tip of the triangle is Ignite. This is where you create advocates of those same clients, where you educate them for the referrals that you want, where you give them these maybe exclusive events that only they have access to. So as we move through and here's what's great about the experience elevation model, Ian, it doesn't matter where you enter it. It doesn't have to be linear. If you're having challenges and really growing the business, you maybe need to think about some attraction strategies. Maybe you started enticed. Maybe you've been doing this a long, long time, and you're starting to realize that maybe your clients are turning over a little bit, and you're not getting the newest clients. But you want to think about, how do I re engage my existing clients? Maybe you need to do some Ignite, and you might need to have some exclusive events, or tell them the kind of people you want to work with, give them the language of how to refer people to you, so you don't have to enter it's not linear, but you can enter this experience elevation model, where it makes the most sense for you as a sales leader.

Yeah, and for the same side selling audience, what I want people to think about is so there's a couple things that struck me. One is that the different levels you have, entice, invite, Excite, delight, and then ignite. And I was hopeful that it would be Ignite, and there would be an O word, because then it would have been e, i, e, i, o. And so we could have had the Old McDonald as a farm reference, but I didn't get there. And I was like, Man, when I first saw it, I'm like, oh, okay, so it's E, ie, oh, Ignite. Is there? Okay, if we just moved a light to the end and then come up with something great for an O, that would have been it. So that's the first thing that I thought of.

But what I want makes sense, but what I want

people to think about is so the entice part. Think about it as part of the same side pitch, we tell people to entice, disarm and discover. So that entice part is what draws people. And then we invite by saying, so here's the problem we solve for other people. Is that something that might be something we should talk about also great. Then we excite by talking about the results that we've delivered for other people they might see as well, the delight part comes down to, are we delivering those results and following through, or do we just make the sale and didn't complete it? And then that ignite part is really, how are we empowering people to share their experience with others? So I mean, just I saw this direct connection, and it warmed my heart. And if only there was an e, i, e, i, o reference, I would have thought it was true magic.

And you know, when you think about it, so many people that will be reading this book will be responsible for revenue, whether they are leading a brand, whether they're leading a team, whether they're an entrepreneur, whether you're leading in your church or temple, your community. I think everyone listening to your podcast is obviously a leader, and we have this responsibility as sales people to truly make a bigger impact in the world through the products and services that we offer. And so I want people to think about mind share. How do you capture attention? Market share? How do you drive revenue? So be top of mind. Be top of market.

So you also see in the book that revenue reflects. That's relationships, and obviously in sales, that's gold. What are a couple ways that sellers can strengthen relationships so clients become advocates, not just buyers?

I would love people who are listening to think like a concierge, not a bellhop. Now, bellhop is a very important role in a hotel. They move your bags through the lobby to your room super quickly. We want efficiency from our bell hubs, very important role, but the concierge, Ian the concierge, is that revered position in a hotel. It's the person we go to. They know everyone. They suggest the restaurant we didn't even know we needed to eat at. They get us the tickets for this show that we've been desperate to see. You see a concierge. When you think like a concierge, you anticipate needs your clients didn't even know they had. And so what I want people to think about is think like a concierge, not a bell hub. Now what this requires is, let's go on the hotels. Hotels do this so well. They personalize and customize everything. How can you personalize? Now personalization requires information. All that information you gather about your clients. How about you start using it. Customization is about connection. How do you connect at a deeper level, so people feel seen, heard and valued, but then fascination that requires anticipation. How do you be so fascinated about solving some of the challenges your clients have that you anticipate things they didn't even think about, and then all of a sudden they want to do business with you, personalization, customization, fascination, all vital parts of being a sales leader.

Love it, and it's interesting because I think about a couple different examples. One is Barry Glassman, or Glassman wealth. Yes, we know Barry. We love Barry, of course. So Barry talks about people say, Well, who are your biggest competitors? And they list wealth management practices. And Barry says, No, my competitors are Ritz Carlton in four seasons. What do you mean? Well, because that's the level of experience that our clients are used to. That's the expectation they have. We deliver at that level. And it's funny, because we use them for our family and Deborah, my wife, who he knows well when we go there, they always have her tea, the non dairy milk that she uses, the sweetener she uses. And she doesn't ask. They just bring it and she's about to ask every time she's like, You guys already know and it we had a waiter in a restaurant the other night who, when he said this, I was like, Ian, would love this. I said to him, I said, well, and you know that my wife has all these dietary requirements, he said, they're not requirements, they're specifications.

I love it. See that reframe, and someone like Deborah, who is also one of the best cooks you'll ever meet, for anyone who's listening, right? Because she is so creative with what she does have. But what Deborah has is this ability to to make people feel really comfortable with all of that. And she does the pre work in advance, right? And she liaises, and then the hotels and the restaurants. Rashika, know you both. You're like celebrities in that restaurant in DC. They know all of your favorites. I'm sure when I've eaten there with you, they put things to the table that were not on the menu, because they also have customized for your taste and for Deborah. But think about it, if our clients feel like we're paying special attention to them, they will feel like that top tier client, and when revenue reflects relationship, it's because you are invested, because you're paying attention, because you're saying to this person, you are important to me. I'm going to put away my devices and distractions. The only thing I want to do is create and elevate this experience for you right here, right now. And we can all do that. And I call this also like this is creating a champagne moment, right? You know, obviously my love of champagne, but think about it like this, a champagne moment is something that turns an ordinary into an extraordinary experience. And it's like something brings you joy, makes you smile. Think of like a glass of champagne, all those bubbles in there. Think of them as like Joy bubbles. How can you create more of these champagne moments when Barry has Deborah and you there for your portfolio review, and she feels like I don't even have to tell them about my dietary requirements specifications, because they know me so well, that's a champagne moment for her. It's that moment that just makes her smile, because she's like, I'm taken care of. So we can all as leaders in our sales conversations, look for champagne moments every day, not just for ourselves, but for the clients we serve 100%

and it's those little things. It's like when we go to a place and it's like one of our favorite restaurants, we'll come in and Deborah will just order. And we had one of our friends, who's wonderful person, who said, instead of the server, oh, and for her stuff, you know, here, her dietary needs, and the waiter, server, whatever term you want to use, smiled and said, You are such a great friend. We're very familiar with the different dietary suggestions. Questions that Mrs. Altman has, and we've got her all taken care of, but thank you so much for caring about her as much as we do. And I was like, what a lovely way to handle it, because it wasn't like, hey, dirtbag, we already know it.

But I think too, like, think about how easily that translates in sales conversations, if we apply more curiosity to our conversations and we ask better, deeper questions, so we can gather those information points to allow us to personalize and customize in the future. But if we are being more curious, right, rather than prescriptive, once we have the answers to some of those questions, we can bridge the gap between what is it that the client knows, and where can we help them instead of sometimes, I don't know about people listening to this. I'm sure they're never guilty of it, but when people just want to vomit up everything they know about the product or the service, maybe you don't care about any of those things. And I'm the sort of person who will say to a sales person, let me stop you right now. Here's exactly what I need, and this is what I want to know about. But too often people have these scripts, or someone told them they had to say this in this particular sequential order, as opposed to that sense of curiosity. People are curious about Deborah, and they want to be able to provide an experience for her. So that knowledge, those data points they've gathered, allow them to customize and personalize experience. Luxury brands do this better than most people on the planet, and as sales people, we can learn so much from

them. Yeah, I remember one of yours, and my favorite properties is the Four Seasons in Philadelphia, and when they were, when they were at their prior were at their prior location. I remember I was staying there a lot of nights, and my brother was coming into town to visit, and I said, Look, you know, he's coming in. Here's kind of what he looks like. And I had stayed there whatever, you know, couple 100 Nights at this point, and they had never met him. I said, Here's what he looks like. He's probably gonna have a rental car from this company. Here's his luggage is gonna look like. They're like, we got this. Listen, he's a Jack Daniels guy. So just like, if you want to mess with him, you can. So I'm still at my client's office, and my brother's relaying the story. And he gets there, and of course, their expert said, opening the trunk, getting your luggage, seeing your name on that luggage, so they knew it was him. And they said, Oh, Mr. Altman, Welcome to the Four Seasons Philadelphia. Thank you so much. This and that. Listen, you know, here's where the restaurant. Here's where the bar is. Oh, and one thing, sir, just so you know this probably doesn't come into play, but the bar is completely out of Jack Daniels right now, my brother looks at him with this look of shock, and the doorman says, Your brother will be here in about a half hour.

Welcome. The Four Seasons are so brilliant, because what they do, and I love working with them. Four Seasons is a client of mine, of course, but what I love is the Four Seasons staff, Ian, they literally try and out do each other. And when they all get together, when all the different properties get together, they literally tell stories about how they out exceptionalize someone else, and they're always sharing their best stories. Because what's amazing is, not only do they collect the data points, their memory is insane, because the four seasons is now part of the Comcast Center. Comcast, as you know, I do a lot of work. I have had them as a client for 20 years, and I am there every single month. And when I go to the bar to sit down and have and I don't want to be disturbed, I just want to sit there with my laptop and have my laptop and have my dinner. What's amazing is Luis will often say, Miss James, would you like the kale salad with a bottle of sparkling water? And he just puts it there, and it's like I don't even have to think about anything. And how he remembers blows my mind. But what I love is that level of personalization, customization, but there's a certain sense of fascination that those leaders have to have, and that wonderful person who was messing with your brother and was willing to have a little bit of fun with them, he will tell that story forever, and he will always associate four seasons the Brand, specifically, four seasons Philadelphia, with such an exceptional

experience? Yeah, absolutely. So if there's for our listeners, do one thing to elevate their client relationships using the principles of exceptional experiences, what should it be if they pick one or two things to focus on? Where should they start after they get the book,

something, yes, get the book. Of course. You can get it anywhere your favorite books are sold. But I would say, and something that you know that I am famous for in my keynotes, it was also part of my previous book. And the one thing that I would recommend everyone do is to take the advice of my little five year old friend who once challenged me in a debate that we were having, and he said, mean, listen with your eyes. And that's what I want to encourage all of the sales leaders to do, is listen with your eyes. Because when you listen with not just your ears, your heart, your soul, you are able to hear and see things about clients so you can anticipate. Things that they don't even know they need, and then you get to capture the data points in your system so you can refer to them next time to be able to do exactly what we've been talking about. Ian to personalize and customize so they feel seen, heard and valued.

I love that. And I'm going to ask you in a second to let us know where they can get the assessment, where they can take the assessment, which we will put in the show notes. But just kind of a quick recap, luxury is a mindset. So I want our audience to know that luxury is a mindset. We've got those five different levers that we can tap into. It should have been e, i, e, i, o, but you know what? You're just gonna have to live with. It not being that. And then relationships tie back into revenue. And that whole notion that Ian talks about, of listen with your eyes and be engaged in delivering delight for your customers is what drives to then, then being ignited, and now those are the people who are going to drive additional repeat and referral business for you. So Neen, where do people go to do this assessment, like I said, we will put in the show notes as well. And then, of course, how do they connect with you? If they're you know, there might be three people on here aren't already connected with you, and that would be a shame.

You can find everything at mean james.com if you would like to not only complete the Free Self Assessment, but you can also download my research study at luxury is a mindset.com you can get there through name James, but if you want to follow my adventures every day, come and play on Instagram with me. But please find the book exceptional experiences. Order your copy, not just for yourself, but give it to your team. And what I've found Ian is people are buying it for their clients, and they're sending it in with a note that says, I love doing business with you. You're exceptional, and so it makes an easy client gift. It's obviously beautiful with gold pages, and the message is really powerful. So wherever your favorite books are sold, I appreciate every single order. Exceptional experiences,

exceptional experiences. It's an exceptional book. It's always lovely speaking with you. Thanks so much for sharing your wisdom with our audience, and I look forward to seeing you soon, my friend,

absolute privilege. Thank you for everything you do in the world. Of course, you

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